Decisions, Decisions...

Sometimes you have to do the hard things in order to lay hold of the best things. You may be wondering, "What exactly is the best thing for me?". We can often make the mistake of equating any form of success, to destiny or purpose. However, I have learned that while a good thing brings good things, and even good feelings, a good thing does not always mean a "God thing". The very best decisions we make in life will always be the decisions that are "God-approved" and often "Man-confused". Towards the end of my collegiate years, I can remember having to make some decisions that some people did not understand. It was a bit tough, ignoring the inevitable "tug" of many, many opinions especially when you are getting established. Oh yea, if you don't know, I devoted my college years to the craft of dance and am now a professional dancer. So, yes! opinions!!!!!! There seemed like so many of them. I had to, however, go with the BEST—God's approval. So far, His judgment has not led me wrong (are you surprised?). I am in awe at the trajectory of my life and career, since about two days post-grad (lol! that is an accurate count). And, in typical "God-fashion", I am not surprised that more recently, I had to make another tough decision.

A little under a month ago, I was headed from one state to another, to dance in a ballet. Since I knew that I would be in town for a bit, I decided to stay in class (class=IMPORTANT). After one class the director (separate from the original reason I came to this state) made his interest in me, for his company's upcoming production, clear. Almost immediately I knew that I wanted to participate because I would be dancing in the meantime. Fast-forward, I told the director "yes" but with growing reservations as the days went by. As it would turn out, the atmosphere was rigid, at times, I felt belittled because I am black (that feeling was being projected onto me from some of my counter-parts), my dance partner was not supportive or concerned about our process and my growing suspicions had been consistent. Okay! that may have been a lot to take in but I want to paint the clearest picture, possible. In the midst of all of that, I was informed that I would not be compensated. I spoke with the director in candid concern and then was offered very little monetary compensation for a multi-city show, including rehearsals in and out of the theatre, and travel. Before I made my final decision (after two days of official rehearsal), I was challenged internally to not only stand up for myself but also to fight for the artist I have become. Confrontation is not easy for everyone and sometimes we would rather stay in an undesirable situation than to make clear our needs or simply move on. Boldly, I did both.

Coming to that conclusion was not been easy for me at all but making that tough decision lifted a weight off of my shoulders, preserved my career, made way for "God Opportunities and made me my own hero.


**In my previous post, I discussed the importance of the black dance community and that blog was inspired by this same situation. Give it a read!