What I'd like to talk about today is something that may not be talked about enough. Depending on your thought processing and perspective, you may take time to acknowledge when you aren't feeling your strongest, to capitalize on it, or you give it so much attention, leaving space for doubt. I am in no way an advocate for succumbing to the pressures and occasional fatigue that comes with the lifestyle of a dance artist, but I am proposing the benefits of acknowledging our "not-so-perfect" days.
This entire week for me has been filled with ballet classes and rehearsals. There's something about knowing who God called you to be, embracing that and taking that confidence into the very thing He called you to. It changes the game! This entire week has been an amazing one for me because I decided to live in each moment. Y'all know how that is, right? But hear me now. Thursday came around and your girl was feeling the strategic remnants of the hard work I'd put in Monday through Wednesday. (You know, when you were Davalois Fearon on Monday and by Wednesday you'd just taken your first ever dance class!!) I'm not bragging, just trying to paint a picture. We can work really hard for the things we want to achieve and it can be smooth sailing until we meet the inevitable "body feels" that comes with the rigor of dance. So Thursday, yes, let me tell y'all how I had about three "brain farts" and the entire time my balance was not as perched as I would've liked. To top that off, during my solo run thru I did not feel strong internally. You know when you have just finished dancing the kids down (haha. totally not kidding!!!) and all of the energy you needed was there, and you're good?. I was the opposite. From class to rehearsal (dancing full out), I felt that accumulation of "whew I'm tired" and boy did it hit. So here is my point. After my solo the room filled with an inviting silence- the delicate applause of the (rehearsal) audience swarmed in. I thought to myself "Wow! I really didn't feel my strongest and this didn't feel the best but it was effective"
From class that morning to the moments I felt insecure during my solo, I could have given into those pressures and things could've gone significantly left. Instead of succumbing I chose to acknowledge the state my body was in and made the decision to benefit from it. There were times when I would allow the natural progression and workings of dance to defeat me. If I made a mistake, I wasn't competent enough. If I was unable to hold a balance, I would never be able to execute. It took me a little while to grasp this concept: off days can be more productive and fulfilling than the day's we're on but only if we take advantage of them. Don't throw yourself a pity party when you aren't as amazing as you were the day before (This has nothing to do with active consistency [ need that] but has everything to do with owning your moments). Acknowledgment will only be beneficial if you allow yourself to grow from it and be strengthened by it.
Friday, January 25, 2019
Friday, January 18, 2019
The Beginning of a Conversation...
Dance is not about finding the latest "fad" and following it. Searching for a mold to squeeze into, with the hopes of "looking the part" isn't it, either.
I can remember my younger dance days being guided by a thought process that led me to believe, how I looked outwardly was more important than the essence of why we were being trained. It wasn't until my college years- I realized the art of dance, at its truest and most pure, is an inward exploration that is expressive and progressively developed when you possess undying passion and integrity. Like any other art form, sport, or endeavor, each day will not be spectacular. You won't always feel productive, your very best or "on your leg". There is always something to work towards, to learn. However, an overly-presented outward look will never be able to substitute the passion that develops integrity, that drives excellence at any cost, even when all eyes are not on you.
There is this weird thing that has been happening in the dance world for years but has bubbled over with obsession in the past few months. I remember being a middle school dance student at Parkway Middle School of the Arts and being introduced to the extensive legacy of Alvin Ailey American Dance Theatre and Linda Celeste Sims. Yes! Mrs. Sims was plastered all across my agenda (that rings relevant even today since AAADT is completely timeless). During that time I was exposed to the royalty and reverence of dance. To me, that is what mattered. That drew me closer to dance way before I would dive into its education and core, historical values for myself. One upon a time, to see a dancer was to see kings and queens. To see dance was to see this rarity that you dreamed of and wanted to work for and connect to because in order to do it well; to do it with meaning you had to dig deep. "Not just anyone can dance!". Reminiscing on my early encounters with this passion, I image that statement accompanying my thoughts.
We are in a time where the emphasis of dance art in being placed on how many cool photo shoots we can do, how high we can throw up our legs, the things we can do to appear dedicated to this craft, and how many times we can spread to social media's masses that we are working so hard to attain meaningless perfection. Don't get me wrong, never-ending lines, the highly anticipated adage developpe, unexpected balancing and perched pirouettes are amazing. In fact, they are the cherry on top but only when our goal is to share rather than to prove and be approved. Superficial dance will never be the art's truth because dance is to be felt and experienced. Dance has the potential to be healing, enlightening, encouraging and should be personable. It just seems that today, most of the goals are to be proficient instead of effective.
There are so many great trailblazers who have gone before us. They left plenty to feast off of. Dance has to be brought back to the art of dance.
I can remember my younger dance days being guided by a thought process that led me to believe, how I looked outwardly was more important than the essence of why we were being trained. It wasn't until my college years- I realized the art of dance, at its truest and most pure, is an inward exploration that is expressive and progressively developed when you possess undying passion and integrity. Like any other art form, sport, or endeavor, each day will not be spectacular. You won't always feel productive, your very best or "on your leg". There is always something to work towards, to learn. However, an overly-presented outward look will never be able to substitute the passion that develops integrity, that drives excellence at any cost, even when all eyes are not on you.
There is this weird thing that has been happening in the dance world for years but has bubbled over with obsession in the past few months. I remember being a middle school dance student at Parkway Middle School of the Arts and being introduced to the extensive legacy of Alvin Ailey American Dance Theatre and Linda Celeste Sims. Yes! Mrs. Sims was plastered all across my agenda (that rings relevant even today since AAADT is completely timeless). During that time I was exposed to the royalty and reverence of dance. To me, that is what mattered. That drew me closer to dance way before I would dive into its education and core, historical values for myself. One upon a time, to see a dancer was to see kings and queens. To see dance was to see this rarity that you dreamed of and wanted to work for and connect to because in order to do it well; to do it with meaning you had to dig deep. "Not just anyone can dance!". Reminiscing on my early encounters with this passion, I image that statement accompanying my thoughts.
We are in a time where the emphasis of dance art in being placed on how many cool photo shoots we can do, how high we can throw up our legs, the things we can do to appear dedicated to this craft, and how many times we can spread to social media's masses that we are working so hard to attain meaningless perfection. Don't get me wrong, never-ending lines, the highly anticipated adage developpe, unexpected balancing and perched pirouettes are amazing. In fact, they are the cherry on top but only when our goal is to share rather than to prove and be approved. Superficial dance will never be the art's truth because dance is to be felt and experienced. Dance has the potential to be healing, enlightening, encouraging and should be personable. It just seems that today, most of the goals are to be proficient instead of effective.
There are so many great trailblazers who have gone before us. They left plenty to feast off of. Dance has to be brought back to the art of dance.
Tuesday, January 8, 2019
IT'S 2019!!!!!
So here's the absolute truth. I stopped uploading blogs for a few weeks because within days notice I had to be on a plane to Atlanta, GA. Knowing that I would not have this computer with me (I try my best to stuff the world, not exceeding 50 lbs, in my suitcases), I made the decision to begin fresh in the new year. I am so grateful and excited to be writing this. We have so much to discuss but to avoid this post reflecting the whirlwind (meaning that in a positive way) of my last 2 months of 2018, we can discuss certain things. Since I began blogging I have tried my best to glue each posts' concept with a theme we can all relate to. This one; you can either Rise or Retreat.
About this days notice to be in ATL that I mentioned earlier; Chiiiile (my SarahJakesRoberts Voice) I took off to do work for Nutcracker Season! This was not your typical Clara and Sugar Plum fairy tale, but a little Brown Sugar and Wild Flower dreamland. Rehearsing, dancing, engaging and living with Ballethnic Dance Company had the potential to be a bit scary but was truly life changing. Hear me out! Have ya'll ever prayed for your dreams to manifest? Without any reservations besides wanting your heart's desires to blossom before your eyes? I believe we have all been there. I talk to God alot about my dreams and I have been blessed with opportunities that would, in my opinion, blow some of your minds but this one had me like "But God, hol' up real quick. This is alot". In the span of three weeks I flew to Atlanta, did Thanksgiving back in South Florida, flew back to Atlanta, learned choreography for Snow, Arabian, some party scene (didn't end up doing that except in rehearsals. lol), and performed before we actually hit the first theatre. Talk about whirlwind!!
This opportunity was the beginning of a long-waited dream so why was I hesitant and reserved? I dug deep down and just got real with myself and with God. I didn't feel worthy or strong enough to wear such a heavy crown. I love everything about what I do. I love everything about ballet. But everything was happening so fast, and happening even faster was the demand for me to choose my stance. "You can either Rise or Retreat". Mantles re placed before us to thrust, push, strengthen, accelerate and so much more. I felt every single motion. It's like this: you prepare and you practice. Prepare and practice some more. When that opportunity comes knocking, you owe it to God, yourself, and every single person whose life is depending on your gift, to RISE! Never force yourself into believing that you are not capable or deserving. Wherever God places you, He needs you (that'll preach!!! I'm just saying). There are so many reasons why I love Ballethnic and it would literally take all night to write it out but Nena Gilreath, Wavery Lucas, Lydia Mitchell (Abarca) Dale Shields... God sends. Each of these legends snatched my life and my body. My love and hope for the dreams that I've had since high school, were revived and clarified. Just when I thought I had reached my optimum level, BOOM, Waverly taught company class, (lololol. mannn, one day my leg turned out an extra 4 degrees, not lying) but seriously, I suddenly grabbed a hold of this permission I never knew existed. I was able to blossom and focus on me. Not being the one everyone looks up to, is inspired by, is coming to for questions, (all of which I am thankful for and humbled by) but the girl who can clearly see the best image of herself and plow for it in a healthier manner. Next to all of the legends I previously mentioned, is someone who contributed to my growth when it mattered most, company member, Karla Tyson. When the coaches are now in the theatre seats and the directors are swamped in company business, things can change. It's like you're on your own but it cool because you've rehearsed 53638 times. This is different. When I questioned my capability of rising, I watched Karla. When I wanted to be a coke vendor (hilarious) instead of doing Arabian because I allowed my faith to waver, I watched Karla. A woman of many hats, grace, strength, leadership, stealth and beauty; I thank God for being in an environment that nurtured me and that housed someone as brilliant as her.
Although this was a simplified version of my last two months of 2018, I pray you got the picture. Go after your dreams, walk in humility, be eager to unlearn and grow. You can't develop without being challenged. Even if it seems impossible or too tough, remember what you prayed for, believe you are strengthened for YOUR crown and know that when you see opportunity face to face you have just two options. Retreat or RISE.
About this days notice to be in ATL that I mentioned earlier; Chiiiile (my SarahJakesRoberts Voice) I took off to do work for Nutcracker Season! This was not your typical Clara and Sugar Plum fairy tale, but a little Brown Sugar and Wild Flower dreamland. Rehearsing, dancing, engaging and living with Ballethnic Dance Company had the potential to be a bit scary but was truly life changing. Hear me out! Have ya'll ever prayed for your dreams to manifest? Without any reservations besides wanting your heart's desires to blossom before your eyes? I believe we have all been there. I talk to God alot about my dreams and I have been blessed with opportunities that would, in my opinion, blow some of your minds but this one had me like "But God, hol' up real quick. This is alot". In the span of three weeks I flew to Atlanta, did Thanksgiving back in South Florida, flew back to Atlanta, learned choreography for Snow, Arabian, some party scene (didn't end up doing that except in rehearsals. lol), and performed before we actually hit the first theatre. Talk about whirlwind!!
This opportunity was the beginning of a long-waited dream so why was I hesitant and reserved? I dug deep down and just got real with myself and with God. I didn't feel worthy or strong enough to wear such a heavy crown. I love everything about what I do. I love everything about ballet. But everything was happening so fast, and happening even faster was the demand for me to choose my stance. "You can either Rise or Retreat". Mantles re placed before us to thrust, push, strengthen, accelerate and so much more. I felt every single motion. It's like this: you prepare and you practice. Prepare and practice some more. When that opportunity comes knocking, you owe it to God, yourself, and every single person whose life is depending on your gift, to RISE! Never force yourself into believing that you are not capable or deserving. Wherever God places you, He needs you (that'll preach!!! I'm just saying). There are so many reasons why I love Ballethnic and it would literally take all night to write it out but Nena Gilreath, Wavery Lucas, Lydia Mitchell (Abarca) Dale Shields... God sends. Each of these legends snatched my life and my body. My love and hope for the dreams that I've had since high school, were revived and clarified. Just when I thought I had reached my optimum level, BOOM, Waverly taught company class, (lololol. mannn, one day my leg turned out an extra 4 degrees, not lying) but seriously, I suddenly grabbed a hold of this permission I never knew existed. I was able to blossom and focus on me. Not being the one everyone looks up to, is inspired by, is coming to for questions, (all of which I am thankful for and humbled by) but the girl who can clearly see the best image of herself and plow for it in a healthier manner. Next to all of the legends I previously mentioned, is someone who contributed to my growth when it mattered most, company member, Karla Tyson. When the coaches are now in the theatre seats and the directors are swamped in company business, things can change. It's like you're on your own but it cool because you've rehearsed 53638 times. This is different. When I questioned my capability of rising, I watched Karla. When I wanted to be a coke vendor (hilarious) instead of doing Arabian because I allowed my faith to waver, I watched Karla. A woman of many hats, grace, strength, leadership, stealth and beauty; I thank God for being in an environment that nurtured me and that housed someone as brilliant as her.
Although this was a simplified version of my last two months of 2018, I pray you got the picture. Go after your dreams, walk in humility, be eager to unlearn and grow. You can't develop without being challenged. Even if it seems impossible or too tough, remember what you prayed for, believe you are strengthened for YOUR crown and know that when you see opportunity face to face you have just two options. Retreat or RISE.
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